One thing I’ve noticed about myself if that I’m a bit of a perfectionist and a people pleaser. I seek people’s approval, I’m not proud to admit it, but I do. I’ve been talking about making a lifestyle change and the desire to start a blog for the past two years and well, yeah. Let’s just say not much has changed since then except the fact that I’ve managed to hit publish on a handful of posts here and there. To say it’s been sporadic would be a complete understatement.
So why have I not managed to stay consistent?
I guess I was waiting for my family and friends to be as enthusiastic about the idea as I was, and when they weren’t, it paralyzed me. In person I’m a pretty confident individual but for some reason putting myself out there for the world to see has had my emotions all sorts of fucked up. Will people judge me, will anyone even bother to read what I write, and what if people think I’m blogging for attention…the list goes on.
But as the months pass by the world changes around me and yet I feel that my life is stagnant because I know deep down inside of me that blogging is something I really want to do. In fact I know it’s something I need to do, even if it’s for reasons I have yet to fully understand. It took two years but it finally hit me. I don’t need other people’s stamp of approval. They’re my goals, my journey, my future. So as of today I am putting my words into actions. I will exercise more, take better care of myself, blog consistently and I will do more things that make me happy. Whatever the outcome ends up being at least I’ll know that I did it for my self. Wish me luck!
Cheers to new beginnings and to breaking down walls we too often build for ourselves.